February 2012
23 posts
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I SAW GHOST RIDER 2 THIS WEEKEND
Thought I’d share the closing credits since these guys will be sweeping the Oscars in 2013:
Writers: Two 14 year old skater boys from the Philly ‘burbs
Director: No one
Music Supervisor: Skrillex’ iPod on shuffle
Casting: Yahoo Answers
Hair/Makeup: A meth addict
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THINGS I'VE SEARCHED ON WEB MD
can you die of smelling something terrible, (ex. Canal St in Manhattan)
will I go blind from getting shampoo in my eye
will I get brain damage from accidentally spraying perfume in my ear
what about hairspray in the ear, more brain damage?
can a person live on hot cheese and gummy candy alone
a homeless man coughed in my face will I be OK
can you get Hepatitis from sharing a water park
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LAST MINUTE VALENTINE'S DAY GIFT IDEAS
IF YOU’RE UNEMPLOYED: Swiffer the apartment for your spouse. Take the ball of hair-dust from the Swiffer, tape it to a swatch of corduroy and add googly eyes. Presto! Adorable stuffed animal.
IF YOU LIVE NEAR CHINATOWN: Buy a knock-off designer handbag. Fill with cell phone cases and incense. Garnish with fake Ray-Ban sunglasses.
IF YOU’RE DATING AN ACTOR/MODEL: A mirror.
IF YOU...
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THOUGHTS I HAD DURING "SMASH" LAST NIGHT
Katherine McPhee is so pretty and as interesting as oh I don’t know a Pet Rock
Why am I watching this
How much did NBC spend on advertising this show I wish they used the money instead to end world hunger
I wonder if Courtney will win the Bachelor
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THINGS I THOUGHT DURING "THE VOICE" LAST NIGHT
Why is Blake Shelton the only one who knows how to say normal person things
Can someone besides Christina please pick out clothes for Christina
Where does Adam Levine live I’m asking for a friend
Does Cee-lo have magical powers
I bet Cee-lo has magical powers
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